Everything sublime is as difficult as it is rare. Baruch Spinoza

Sunday, April 10, 2011


Don't be fooled, this is from last year.
It rained last night, thunder & lightning....oh my. Wash away the winter dirt and gloom, bring on the green.

Some of you will remember that I started a political blog a year or so ago, which I abandoned rather promptly. I became blocked every time I sat down to write. It was the strangest thing, I went blank. But then, when I consider myself, it probably is not such a mystery. I dislike tasks, I don't function well under orders and I easily distract and lose interest. I basically had set myself up to quit, because I gave myself an order to write specifically on one subject. Don't tell me what to do!, was my response to myself. This little insight also gives a hint as to why I work with horses and not humans.

I learned last evening on FaceBook that I have a cousin who is a birther. Ah, the family tree. She is also very religious. And concerned. I, on the other hand, am a heathen and fairly pissed off. I am no fan of President Obama and I will not cast another vote for him, as I am also fairly scorned, but come on, really.

I don't know why, but I was thinking this morning about the years which have passed and yet I am basically what I was born as. The serious faced little girl, standing off to the side of the crowd, never quite mixing in, but never quite walking away either. The only thing changed is I'm not a little girl anymore. Many valiant attempts at changing myself have resulted in my remaining myself, so I guess the lesson learned is I wasted some time. I don't do that anymore.

I don't understand Kindle. I love books. Real books. I own them. I display them. I lay in bed at night, turning pages. I have no desire to read in my bed with a piece of electronics. But then, I am in the dark ages on all of the electronics. I think I am better off for it, but that is an opinion of a slightly crabby, reclusive grey haired one. So take it for what it is worth.

I think I shall go out and play in the mud with my beasties now. Good times, oh yah.


  1. Well, I told you once or twice before that we are surprisingly similar in many ways. I won't vote for him either. They say in Spanish that when you burn yourself with milk every time you see a cow you cry. I have no idea who I will vote for since the longer I live the less I understand the "party of the working people" but I have a deep and disturbing knowledge of the party that since the 1980s to date is controlling our country.

    I tried time and again to write a journal. It is a good exercise if you like it. I thought it was a matter of discipline. It is not for me. In my personal case it is a matter of defiance. I know you understand why I never wrote a journal except to record what plants were planted when and I was not very efficient at that either. But about me? I will take that with me to the other side.

    Here of course it is raining. Yesterday we went out for a little while to one of my favorite nurseries. The rainy and cold winter here sent some borderline plants to an early demise. I am as I said, a contrary, so I asked Barry to take me to the nursery because I want to replace them. As a memento mori I will use the dead branches to support the new ones.
    Which pretty much represents how I feel right now about my past hopes for change. Who would have "thunk" that after all I wasn't the hope I was waiting for as someone suggested and certainly reality has proven that neither was he?

    So I am going to bury my head, not in the sand but in the garden and try hard not to think about what is happening around our country and beyond. I am still wondering how is it that you vote for a Democrat and you still get a Republican instead? Ah...there goes the man behind the curtain again.

    Enjoy the mud and the beasties. I wish I were there to join you.

  2. I feel your pain! LOL
    I also LOVE books, the feel, the smell...

  3. Heathen you may be [though I have hopes for you yet ;P], friend you will always be, slightly crabby & intelligent & unusual. There is only one slight improvement...you really should prefer cats to dogs. *howls hysterically* I crack me up. Are you suffering end of winter angst? I admit when I see your autumn colours & your spring freshness I suffer a little twinge of envy until I remember the mud & that it's not so much fun to live with. ♥hug♥

  4. I enjoy the beasties, mostly, but not the mud gsc!

    Allegra, I am honored to be your similar. I don't know how you would feel about it you knew how difficult I can be! I am pleased to read you are out and about. I try to bury my head in anything I can find, but I can't find a thing deep enough to shut out the awful noise.

    I hope you don't feel my pain Missy. It is profound and deep.

    Ganeida my dear and longest blog friend, put you efforts of hope toward someone who may give you a glimmer of possibility. I am a deeply entrenched non-believer, not apt to be moved. I will tell you a secret. I love my cat Margaret. She is a beastie, a bonafide. I have room in my heart for them all.
    I am not having end of winter angst, I am having 'I live in a cruel, heartless, ignorant, shameless, crude, violent, soulless society' angst. It is the worst kind.

  5. And my cousin is a deeply engrained birther. I barely know her, but I now know more than I want to. I feel slightly ill.

  6. I have some extremely conservative relatives (including my mother), and that has been a source of great conflict and sometimes agony, particularly during election years and regarding issues that relate directly to me and to my family, like healthcare. I almost have to shut myself off when I'm around my parents, and that's deeply distressing but otherwise I'd go nuts. I, too, am so disappointed in Obama and how we appear to be losing ground in so many ways as progressive people. I do think there must be a third party -- not the Tea Party but a true people's party not beholden to corporate interests --

  7. I imagine I will vote for the Green Party candidate. It is hard to understand the conservative mindset, isn't it Elizabeth. This cousin of mine absolutely believes Obama was born in Kenya and there is nothing that will convince her otherwise. Unbelievable.


I really appreciate the concept and sentiment behind awards, but I cannot participate in them anymore. I have too may and I have not got the time to devote to participating properly. To all who have honored me, I am grateful but I don't have seven more things to tell anyone about myself! And I'm a terrible passer-oner.