Everything sublime is as difficult as it is rare. Baruch Spinoza

Monday, November 30, 2009

Moving Forward, Looking Backward



I think a sunset is appropriate to my life at this time. There have been many ends which have happened over the course of a year, that a sunset image is as fitting as any.


Time marches on and it does it at a fast clip when you are older. So you either keep up or you get run over. Sometimes keeping up seems like a lot of work and I want to just stop by the side of the road. Alas, it doesn't work that way. So I try to keep up.


It would be very easy for me to wallow in sadness. This would do me about as much good as wallowing in the mud. So today life picks up its pace once again.


My farrier will be here today. He will want to know where Shaka is. My only boarder was out last evening. I saw her walking around the property. She was looking for Shaka. So many horses here and his presence is so obviously missed.


Life moves forward and so shall I. There is a benefit to having so many lives depending upon you; there is no chance to sit overlong in sorrow. The horses need to be fed, turned out and the barn needs cleaning. No matter what other circumstances, they must eat. I think it is a good thing.


So I will look to the southeast, tip my cap and say "Happy Trails" then put one foot in front of the other as I step into the future.

12 comments:

  1. Sandra: I'm sure this time is not easy. Routines and obligations are often helpful tools to get us moving and give our minds an opportunity to think on other things.

    Conversely, our routines are often full of reminders of what we have lost.

    Think of all the love and value you each derived from the relationship. All that remains with you and was with him until the end. Hold to the love and the value.

    Thinking of you. Exhale.

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  2. Thanks Bonnie. I'm actually doing OK. He helped me out on this by going in his own way. There is definitely an empty spot in my life, as well as an empty prominently placed stall in the barn, but I am past the OMG stage and into accepting the fact of it.

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  3. The ones with the biggest hearts & the biggest personalities leave the biggest holes in our lives & the reality is we have our animals for such a short time. There are still those moments that trip me up & I have to remember all over again that Gyver is gone & I had him longer than I had any right to.

    Glad you are doing ok. The others are not Shaka but they need you too & love is love.

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  4. Thinking of you during this difficult time. I am sure Shaka would want you to carry on with all the strength and vitality that he respected in you. Hugs. Ash

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  5. What more can we do? Moving forward, with an occasional look back, is all we have.

    On the other hand, I truly believe that their are lots of spirits, (people, dogs, horses and cats,) watching out for me and over me. all I have to do is close my eyes and there they are.

    Call me crazy, i don't care. I have been called way worse.

    With regards to rescuing people? give me a four-legged anyday. I am only working with people because of location. If I had a choice, beyond do nothing, I would choose the animals. EVERY TIME!

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  6. Just know you have others guiding you along with your day. My thoughts are with you with each step...

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  7. Sandra, this is such sad news. I am sorry for your loss. No matter how many or what type of animals we have, our love for them makes them a part of our family and losing them is never easy.

    Keeping busy and attending to others that need you is a good thing.

    Shaka looked like he was a beautiful horse.

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  8. Ganeida, yes the big personalities give you heartburn and joy! I had Shaka for 18 years. Seems too short.

    Queen, Thank you. Did I ever tell you I have a mare named Queen? She is a daughter of my recently gelded stallion Topper. When I see your 'name' I sort of transpose the two of you. She really is a QUEEN! It's not a bad thing. : )

    Ashley, Shaka would be loving all the attention via internet. He was not a humble horse. I secretly enjoyed his arrogance. Maybe not so secretly. : )

    gsc, I'd never call you crazy. If there is a belief in a soul then you have to believe animals have souls as well. The idea that they don't is ludicrous.

    Judy, I know you have a big heart for the equines. Your thoughts and concern are so much appreciated.

    Liss, Thank you. Yes, keeping busy is good medicine.

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  9. I just got a chance to read the blog update. You have certainly been on my mind. So many changes in a short time. As always, your description of putting one foot in front of the other because you have other lives dependent on you doing so, is spot on. It is what you do and you do it well.

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  10. There is no other alternative than to move forward with the occasional look back...that usually comes in the silence of the night or while doing what we did with the lost loved one. He had such a giant impact on all around him he will be missed. They say time is a healer...perhaps..but the memories remain with us forever.

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  11. Jean, no one knows this better than you. Sometimes it seems like a burden to have to keep going, but in the end it's a blessing.

    Alicia, I think I catch a glimpse of him throughout the day. He was a 14.3hh bundle of dynamo!

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I really appreciate the concept and sentiment behind awards, but I cannot participate in them anymore. I have too may and I have not got the time to devote to participating properly. To all who have honored me, I am grateful but I don't have seven more things to tell anyone about myself! And I'm a terrible passer-oner.