Everything sublime is as difficult as it is rare. Baruch Spinoza

Friday, January 14, 2011

Jeff, Dorothy & Me

I watched the profile of Jeff Bridges on American Masters a couple of evenings ago. He said something which caught my attention; "Cynics are sort of crushed romantics."
I think I came out of the womb casting a cynical eye. Now I know this is probably not true, but that would mean I was a crushed romantic at a young age.

Although no Dorothy Parker, I'm not mean, I am the one in the crowd that throws the cold water. I'm the person who does not get invited to the party of happy talk. Somewhere in there I will insert a "You really think so", or "It will not surprise me if.....", or "But....". I realize that conversation with me often becomes a boxing match, or perhaps a chess game. Or, as is often the case, the other party, while their eyes are spinning in their head, says something about the weather. 

There have been times when I have tried to be like most people I know. Minnesota people. People who keep their opinions to themselves, at least to your face. I have tried to smile, keep quiet and quit bursting bubbles. I come across, at least in my own cartoon bubble, as a Stepford Wife on uppers.

Perhaps I am a frustrated diva who wanted, or perhaps needed, her own Round Table, surrounded by urbane and witty wags who hung on my every word, as I opined with smooth alacrity. In truth, I can't even keep my audience of dogs interested for more then a minute. Everyone needs a dream.

My original point, before I went off in another direction, is; I am off for another acupuncture treatment today. My cynicism toward this was dropped a few years ago when I saw how it helped a couple of my performance horses. Somehow in this upside down world of mine, it's animals first, two-legger sometime later. If I am going to be able to care for the animals into the future, this two-legger needs to turn that equation around for now.

I had no idea what I was going to do with that quote. I knew I wanted to use it, so I did. Sometimes a person simply needs to go with the flow. Even when the result is convoluted.


  1. Such an interesting description provided by Bridges ... 'crushed romantics' ... Crushing can produce inner anger and in my experience cynicism often comes from deeply buried rage - justifiable rage.

    You may have made a link to your chronic pain here (by connecting cynicism, crushing and chronic pain in one post) ...

    Check out "Divided Mind" by John Sarno, M.D., who has a simple, amazing technique for ridding oneself of chronic pain (even if it occurs where you have previously injured yourself) by dealing in a very benign way with past and current unconscious rage.

    BTW - I like where your 'flow' takes you - it's always a pleasure to read your beautifully written posts.

  2. This is such a beautifully written, winding post. I have some similar characteristics, I think, and I'm terribly self-conscious about that part of me (cynical, argumentative, etc.).

    As for acupuncture and general self-care, self-healing, etc. -- well, I don't have horses, but I do have children and they've reaped benefits well before I have! The old analogy of the oxygen and airplanes has always seemed ridiculous to me or my personal experience --

  3. You know the thing with crushing? It's what you do to acquire healing ungents & sweet oils. It can be a long & complicated process & for all the crushing you only ever get a few drops at a time. lol Just enjoy the process. I am so happy the pins & needles are working for you! ☺ ♥


I really appreciate the concept and sentiment behind awards, but I cannot participate in them anymore. I have too may and I have not got the time to devote to participating properly. To all who have honored me, I am grateful but I don't have seven more things to tell anyone about myself! And I'm a terrible passer-oner.