Everything sublime is as difficult as it is rare. Baruch Spinoza

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Thursday's Thinks


I have forced myself to contradict myself in order to avoid conforming to my own taste.
Marcel Duchamp (1887-1968) French Artist

Contradictions. We are made up of a series of contradictions. Some people more so than others, but it is, I think a common thread and what makes people interesting. Also frustrating.

I am a walking contradiction. I don't have religious beliefs and yet I can be preachily moralistic, almost Calvinist. I have an unease about people becoming so isolated in their lives as they retreat into the iPods, cellphones and twitter life, yet I blog. I don't care for coarse behavior, yet I can be as coarse as anyone if the right button is pushed. I am somewhat reticent and then gregarious. The idea of people going out shooting animals for sport is repulsive to me, yet I eat meat.

Doublethink means the power of holding two contradictory beliefs in one's mind simultaneously, and accepting both of them.
George Orwell

I say "God help me", but I don't believe in God. Yet, I firmly believe in the freedom to worship and would argue for that right to my last breath. I also would argue as forcefully that I should be able to be free from religion. I admire and enjoy beautiful things in life, yet I am always a mess. I believe people have a right to their own beliefs, yet I get really annoyed when those beliefs are uninformed.

I love my dogs and usually want to wring their necks. I think politically correct is a label conservatives came up with to excuse boorish behavior and yet I often fall into the trap.

I was urban born and raised, thought the country would never be for me. I live in the country. I like living in the country but would not want to raise a child in the country. I had one child and didn't want the responsibility of any more and I own 25 horses and all the responsibility that comes with it.

I love being around people and I seek solitude. I can take myself very seriously and I can laugh at myself easily. I can be smug and condescending and humble and self-deprecating. I believe one can only forgive if forgiveness is asked for, yet I don't have an ability to turn my back on people.

I'm simple, complex, impossible, easy-going, kind, hard as nails, hardworking, languid. Introspective, thick as a brick, intellectual and sophomoric. Friendly and withdrawn. I guess I'm human.

17 comments:

Sandy said...

Stretching my blogging legs today, thought I'd stop in and say hi.

Beautiful horse in your banner.

Loved the sign in your pic. lol

Stop in for a visit
Sandy

Kacie said...

I am glad to know there are others out there who don't believe in god! Except I am not very public about it because I am scared what close friends and family will think of me then! I was raised catholic and all my family and relatives on both sides are church-going people... so yeah... lol

Sandra said...

Kacie, my belief system has been developed over the course of a long spiritual journey which brought me to were I am. I know a lot about various religions and I understand why people believe, I understand that it is complex and the reasons are many. I don't have an argument with it until religion starts to permeate public policy. Then there is a problem. I will say I have a problem with the hypocrisy that very often accompanies religion. But, the skepticism I may have about organized religion has nothing to do with God. You can believe in God and not in religion. At some point my intellectual side could not accept the idea of a omnipotent being overseeing our lives. It makes no sense to me and I don't have that thing in me, that 'faith' that allows me to overrule thought and conclusion.

I don't think you need to go to war with your family over this. I believe religion is best served if it is kept within one's heart and not worn on the sleeve and I think the same goes for my own belief. It's not anyone's business. This is a blog of my thoughts, opinions, actions and anything else I come up with, so I may talk about things that I wouldn't approach in general. This blog is sometimes the physical evidence of my brain!

Sandra said...

Thanks, glad you stopped by.

Ganeida said...

The state of being human! :) Isn't it fun? The contridictary types are much more fun to play with than the consistent sort ~ faaar more interesting. Something bugging you that you need to get off your chest?

Sandra said...

Me? Finding me without something to get off my chest would be far more difficult! I could rant and rave for the next hour and just be warming up. I do not have a little ray of sunshine following me around. : ) It's not easy living in this head.

Ganeida said...

Lol. Well go for it girl! I enjoy your rants. :D

Sandra said...

That's good to know, because I can't help myself. Or maybe I can but don't want to. I've been at this for 5-6 months and sometimes I wonder if I will run out of things to say. Then I think, nah, not as long as the earth stays on its axis!

Ashley Dumas said...

Love your thursday thinks Sandra. I was laughing because I often think of my self as an introverted extrovert or and extroverted introvert. I am an organized air head etc...: ) : ) Well I think that you hit it on the head when you said you are human. Defining oneself is an ongoing an complex process. : )

You are getting pretty popular over here!!!!

You may need to start copy writing your material ; )

Ash

Sandra said...

Ha! That's funny, copyright. Glad to see you are having a little spare time. : )

Susan said...

I loved this blog and feel much the same as you on many things. Thank you for it.

Sandra said...

Susan, you live in my brain too, do you! It's not easy is it. : )

julochka said...

i came by via just jules and am so glad i did. this post totally resonates with me...i've been thinking along similar lines in my head for awhile, but just hadn't blogged it yet. now i don't need to!

i'll definitely stop by again!

:-)
/julie

Sandra said...

I knew when I wrote it that it's the human condition. Sometimes I think we all feel whiplash as we dart from one way of thinking to another, seemingly simultaneously.

Thank you for visiting. Jules sent me a link for your blog 'balderdash', but I have been too busy to give it the necessary time. I'll get there after the day is done. : )

Susan said...

It is not easy, but I wouldn't have it any other way. :) I think the dichotomy lends itself to balance.

tangobaby said...

I like this post a lot...Makes a lot of sense to me! You sound like me, and a lot of other people I know...

Just wanted to say hello and thank you for your lovely comments lately.

Sandra said...

Nice to see you!