I'm writing these thoughts because I had to fill in the patient questionnaire before my appointment with the new Primary on Friday. There is a mental health portion, which I've always filled in honestly except for question #9, the last question. I feel it's worded wrong, which is why I have never been truthful. This time I didn't care. The question is about feeling hopeless, perhaps wanting to hurt yourself. Feeling it might be better if you weren't here. I do not want to hurt myself. I am feeling hopelessness, for more reasons than just my health, but three years of being ignored by the medical establishment may tend to make a person feel unworthy of care. I got a phone call from the clinic, a nurse with a concerned tone to her voice. She wanted to know if I was considering harming myself and if perhaps I should go to the emergency room. I held my smart-ass tongue on that. If you aren't feeling suicidal before you go through a six hour wait in ER, you will be afterward. I reassured her I am not in danger of harming myself, I just decided to be honest. Then I said after three years of being ignored, I would find not feeling a sense of hopelessness to be abnormal. I flustered her a little so she went back to the dialogue. I assured her again I am not suicidal. Then the misplaced wise guy came along. I said I don't feel suicidal, maybe a little homicidal. OOPS! I immediately said, joke...joke. Yes, I am a wise guy with occasional tinges of sardonicism slipping in. But mostly I'm just that guy.
This could be an interesting appointment.
14 comments:
It's all about their liability coverage. It will be interesting to see if the new doctor has a glimmer of humor. The smart ones do.
I'll find out soon enough, Boud. I am on my last nerve.
I hate those forms. And I hate being asked about my mental health strangely enough, mostly because they go into their algorithms to tick off their boxes. I've tried everything, I'm not dead yet, next question. The nurse needed a better sense of humour, in my humble opinion. If you can joke about suicide, what the hell can you joke about? I like dark humour, obviously.
I hope the appt goes okay. My husband said he was depressed one time and they practically called out the people in white coats:)
I am getting no where with my Chronic Lymes. I got a referral to Infectious Diseases...that took two weeks, then I found out that they refuse to see Chronin Lymes...so now I have a referral to an RA Doc...so we will see if that actually becomes an appt. Frustrating
Far Side, I am hopeful something may happen for me. I knew if I answered that in the affirmative it was going to set off a reaction. Which is why I haven’t before. I would think Lyme disease would get better treatment. I know another woman with chronic Lyme who has had your experience. We will probably have a ceremony when the jacket hits the bin!
As someone who has had a family member commit suicide I know that they usually do not say anything about it, that is part of what happens, and part of how their minds are. A better question would be is their anyone in your family who is suffering from depression.
I’m sorry Marlane. I had a very good friend die by suicide. It’s an awful thing to live with. I am clinically depressed. I am not suicidal. My problem with the wording is if you acknowledge the lowness which comes with depression it jumps to suicidal ideation. There should be a 10th question asking if you are suicidal, if you have suicidal ideation. The way it’s worded has not allowed to acknowledge the rest of the question.
Never stop being a smart ass.....
We deal with MDD and a 'wish I were dead' all of the time in our house. If your quality of life sucks, why would you feel otherwise?
In truth, if you cannot lead a full life, it doesn't feel like you'd want to go on.
That said, it is something to be discussed. If your condition makes you feel hopeless, then you have the right to feel that way.
That nurse will take note and perhaps your concerns will be dealt with.
I have my fingers crossed.
Lori, highly unlikely that will happen. It seems it’s a reflex action!
Val, how right you are. I’m more about being useless. But I don’t contemplate taking my life. But my life is not fulfilling and I would do better if I knew why. All the crossed fingers cannot hurt.
Pixie, you were in spam. I agree about asking those questions. Would a person say yes if they were contemplating self-harm? Probably not.
I'm reading this Post late, but it's a good one. I guess I use similar Dark Humor and am Sardonic by Nature. Sometimes those asking the Questions, can't really Handle the Truth. I too would think it Abnormal if someone were not feeling Hopelessness after Years of the runaround or being neglected... how else would they expect anyone to Feel?
Indeed, Dawn. It seems ridiculous to me that they would be surprised.
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