I want to thank everyone who offered their kindness about Mark's and my health problems. It's a bit overwhelming but we are doing ok with it.
I want to clarify my own issue. This is something I've been coping with for over two years. It actually started in 2019 but I didn't think much about it then. Just aching and fatigue in my legs which then became lower back pain but nothing that stopped me from doing things. Over the past couple of years it has become worse. I have been seeking medical attention. Initially it was thought I had spinal stenosis, which I don't. I've been through physical therapy and pain management. Frankly, I started to give up. Then Mark's diagnosis happened. I was sinking further into fatalism, then somehow I snapped out of it.
I realize I need to push more. I'm an older, overweight woman who presents with pain. I'm told to exercise more, lose weight, do stretching, etc. There has been no testing for a medical condition, other than the initial spinal stenosis thought. Then I'm told to take pain medication. Mark wants to be with me on this visit because he has come to understand women get ignored. He wants to advocate for me and I've decided to let him. There are many conditions with my symptoms but none of them are being addressed. I went, over the course of a couple of years, from an active person caring for a lot of horses, a large house and property to someone who can barely cross a room. I tend toward stoicism so perhaps I'm not adequately expressing myself. I'm also fairly accomplished at pushing things aside and feeling all will be fine if I only do "this". None of "this" is working.
Anyway, I appreciate being able to express these things here and I appreciate the kindness I receive. I have to wait a couple of weeks for the appointment but this time I expect more.
14 comments:
Good for you. And it's good to have a team going. I wish you had my doctor, who listens intelligently,
Thanks, Boud. This is a relatively new dr to me, the prior dr moved to TX. I may not be communicating in a way she understands. Maybe I need to say I'm falling apart, glue me back together!
I am so sorry that you don't get the attention that you may need.
It is always great to have an advocate in your corner.
A friend of mine went through years of mysterious symptoms and finally was diagnosed with Lyme's Disease which gave her some answers.
Goodness such a change in your life. I hope and have my fingers crossed that your questions get addressed.
I send good wishes to you and your husband that you will receive the answers and care you deserve.
Take Care,
Kaye
Park City, UT
Val, I think I’ve been caught in magical thinking. If I just do this exercise or use this massager or…. None of it works. Something is wrong. Thanks for your words. I know you are fully aware of medical conditions and problems that come with them.
Thank you, Kaye. I appreciate your kind words.
It sounds to me like you are ready to deal with what your body has been going through, and that is all good. Being there for each other is so important. One thing I know for sure.....you are still able to make beautiful meals and take fabulous photos!
Thanks, Lori! Last night we had frozen pizza. 😄 I need to get the dr engaged in my health, then we may get somewhere.
I'm glad your husband is going with you and how fucking frustrating is that? That a man has to be there for things to be taken seriously! Grrrrrrrrr.
Pixie, you work as a medical professional, I'm sure you see it all the time. My son says it's a holdover of the patriarchy.
I hope you can make your doctor listen and take your symptoms seriously. You'd think they would be willing to listen if for no other reason than the potential of a lawsuit. I'm definitely hoping for the best for both of you. <3
I think it often comes down to time. They are supposed to see a certain number of patients. Also, gender and age unfortunately play a role. I also don’t think I pushed enough, which I shouldn’t have to do but think I do, as I look back.
Hope you get some well deserved medical attention. Sometimes women are invisible to doctors:(
Yes, Far Side. Even with women drs. I think it's easier to dismiss it as age or inactivity or wanting attention than it is to actually investigate the symptoms.
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